My Mental State

My Biggest secret is the battle I have with myself daily, Why I have trust issues, what I see for my future and what I’m trying to remove from my life.

Depression and anxiety are very common illnesses and each of us experiencing it and handle it very differently.

The past 2 years of my life have been the most challenging years for me, having just come out as gay having a very public response and having a pressure to be happy and dealing with my own demons when in reality I wasnt truley happy I was just going with it.

Coming out was the best thing I have ever done it made me feel free but I still didnt feel accepted. Getting to know this new life and culture was a lot to process and take in and to have my own personal issues still at the back of my mind I accepted everything good and bad because everything was so new and I shouldn’t have I should have just trusted myself. Gay culture in Dublin is very different to what I expected and I still struggle to fit in or feel accepted which can be very hard and lonely. Living a new life after spending 26 years lying to yourself about who you are and creating toxic habits and defenses feels like you just sit and watch the world but never experience living. I’m posting this today because its mental health awareness month and a time we as people should look after each other and not think because something looks perfect on social media that everything is fine I’m not always fine and I use a lot of social media to shadow my real feelings and issues. I attend weekly counselling and each week I try rebuild myself and make changes, I have removed myself from situations I’m not comfortable in as hard as it is to do I’m finally trying to live for myself. I feel strong again but not completely and I want you to know I’m here as a support if you struggle too.

Mental illness is not a weakness each challenge we get past makes us stronger even when things can’t get any worse know that you’ve made it this far and survivors dont give up.

I have done an interview that will be published soon and open up about my issues and what I’m doing to overcome them. Surround yourself with people who care and understand and the people who actually care will already be by your side.

Let go of the things that hurt you because your worth more than that.

Sleeping in the Buff

sleeping in the buff, removing your clothes improves blood circulation, which is good for your heart and muscles. The quality sleep you’ll enjoy also increases the release of growth hormone and melatonin, both of which have anti-aging benefits.

Cooling down tells your body that it’s time to sleep, so sleeping naked — and allowing your body temperature to go down — can actually help you fall asleep faster.

Keeps skin healthy
getting enough sleep could help your skin to recover and stay healthy, and if sleeping naked helps that happen, even better.

Reduce stress and anxiety
it could help reduce your overall stress and anxiety. It’s no secret that poor sleep has a major impact on your stress levels.

Ciaràn knows I refuse to sleep with any clothing purley because I get anxiety attacks and when I’m naked I don’t be as tense or stressed.

Shampoo that shouldn’t be just for women.

Shampoos for men usually don’t cut it. And while some men are fully sold on the benefits of premium male grooming, a lot of men are reluctant to take the plunge of their own accord out of the misplaced fear that taking care of their appearance somehow compromises their masculinity WELL SOME OF THEM.

The Pureology Strength Cure Colour Care Shampoo is great not only if you have dyed or heat treated hair, but if your hair is fine or thinning. The same nutritive benefits of the shampoo which protect chemical and heat damaged hair also restores moisture and strength to hair which is fine or thinning. Now isn’t that Gay ☺

A lot of “women” products have great properties for mens hair, skin and even body. Anyone with a hair issue or skin issue buy products that have the properties to correct or improve it don’t just settle for what gender it’s marketed towards.

Microwave Cup meal.

Peanut Butter & Banana Cake

Completely gluten and dairy free! This Peanut Butter & Banana Cake is super moist, tastes amazing and cooks in less than a minute. What’s not to love?


  • ½ medium banana, mashed
  • 1 tablespoon peanut butter
  • 1 egg white
  • ¼ teaspoon vanilla extract
  • 4 ½ tablespoons oat flour
  • ¼ teaspoon cinnamon
  • ¼ teaspoon baking powder
  • pinch of salt


Mash your banana in a large microwaveable mug, before mixing in the peanut butter, egg white and vanilla. Once combined, add your flour, cinnamon, baking powder and salt. Give it another mix, before placing into the microwave for 45-60 seconds until it’s firm in the middle. You could garnish this dessert with some cream and sliced bananas if you’re feeling fancy.

Ways to brighten up the January Blues.

January gets a hard time as a month doesn’t it? The post-Christmas lull certainly puts a dampener on our spirits and makes everything seem a little more…. Glum. The weather certainly isn’t helping the mood. January, we hate to say it, but we’re not your biggest fan. However, looking on the bright side, we’re not going to let the bad weather and lack of festive food rain on our parade. Let’s have a look at something which will have you feeling good in no time, with some simple January Mood Booster.

A healthy body is a healthy mind and all that… Whilst going to the gym and starting a new fitness regime might be quite the challenge, you can always look good in alternative ways. Why not switch up your grooming game and reinvent yourself in the laziest way possible. Always wanted to grow a beard? Do it! Hair looking a little rugged? Go for a chop! There are plenty of ways you can switch around your grooming routine to help you feel better about your appearance, which may ultimately make you a bit more smug when catching a glimpse of yourself in a mirror 😊




I Am Thankful For All Of Those Who Said, “No” To Me. It’s Because Of Them I’m Doing It Myself.”- Albert Einstein

  • Happiness Is Not Something Readymade. It Comes From Your Own Actions.”-Dalai Lama

  • We Become What We Think About.” -Earl Nightingale

  • Move Out Of Your Comfort Zone. You Can Only Grow If You Are Willing To Feel Awkward And Uncomfortable When You Try Something New.”- Brian Tracy


Dublin model Gary Talbot on finding love


Dublin model on finding love at 27: ‘When I met Ciaran, it was the first time I was ever attracted to anyone’

When Ireland’s top male model, Gary Talbot, was strutting his stuff at London Fashion Week he caught the eye of some of the most beautiful women in the world.

The 27-year-old Dubliner became the first Irishman to take part in what is one of the world’s most celebrated fashion events.

At one stage, quiet-spoken Gary was earning up to €12,000 a day, thanks to his chiselled good looks.

But it’s only in recent months that the towering 6ft 2in Ballyfermot native has accepted and realised that he is in fact gay.The Dub has more than 60,000 followers on his website and he’s constantly being bombarded with messages. Many of those were gay men hitting on him, but it was never something which appealed to himBut last June he was contacted by Dublin optician, Ciaran Hewitt, and Gary’s life changed forever.

“When Ciaran contacted me I was like, ‘yeah he’s probably just like everybody else’,” he explains.

“When I did open his message I was like ‘he seems very nice’ and we were talking for a good while before we ever went out for a coffee.

“Then we went out about eight times for a coffee. I was still thinking ‘this isn’t really for me’, even though I knew it was. I was keeping everything at a slow pace.”

Gary was so terrified about ‘coming out’ that he had anxiety attacks and was so stressed that he lost a stone in weight.“I just didn’t know what was wrong with me,” he reflects. “I went into a panic state, I couldn’t come to terms with it. I never knew. So when the penny dropped I lost over a stone in weight in a matter of weeks, from worry.”

He was petrified his career would be ruined.

“I have a female following and I have a lot of straight men who follow me because they like my fitness posts,” he explains.

“I always considered myself to be a bit of a manly man. I do go to the gym but I’m more into going rock-climbing and getting my hands dirty.

“I’m not your stereotypical type model. I don’t sit at home pampering myself with a face mask on. That’s just not me, so I was afraid I was going to lose that and people would look at me differently and go ‘he’s not a man’ or ‘he’s not a masculine man’.“That was a big part of it – and then with the industry, I was going ‘I’m not going to appeal to women, I’m going to appeal obviously to gay men. I thought I’d lose the straight men following, but, thankfully, I haven’t.”

Even in school Gary just had flings with girls, but was never in a proper relationship.

“I was never going out with anyone really,” he admits. “I had it in my head ‘you know what, I’m probably not interested in anybody’.

“Still to this day I can appreciate somebody’s beauty, but I’ve never been attracted to anybody. So I was like ‘there’s something seriously going on here’.

“I used to be surrounded by stunning people, both women and men. Even with men there was never anything that triggered in my brain.

“So that’s why when I met Ciaran, it was the first time I was ever attracted to a person and I was like ‘holy sh*t, it’s a man’. So it knocked me for six.”

Gary is not a big drinker or socialiser and even since he’s been with Ciaran he’s only been to one gay bar in his life.

“I think I was really lucky because out of all the people who’ve ever mailed me or messaged me he is the only one who has understood me and understood where I was at,” he stresses.

They have now been dating a couple of months.

“My whole life has changed,” he beams. “Obviously I was carrying this stress and then I came out. But nobody cared. Some were shocked, but nobody batted an eyelid.

“I’ve from a very big family and they were very understanding.”

Gary was 21 when he was ‘discovered’ by American model Tyson Beckford. Tyson, who is a judge on Britain and Ireland’s Next Top Model, came across a picture of Gary on Twitter and contacted him and arranged to meet him in Dublin.

Gary now hopes to start up his own men’s skincare company and admits he’s never been happier in his life.

“People look at it [his ‘coming out’] as being unusual at an older age, because kids come out in their teens these days.

“I think if I had known myself I probably would have come out a lot younger. I think it just made it a little bit more confusing that I was older – but just do it, because life it too short.

“You only get one shot at life and I’m glad it’s happened to me now and my life is only starting.”


My Mental State


I Know in the past I mentioned I had a lot of Physical insecurities and that’s all still true but I suffer from a lot of other insecurities and this is just how I try to deal with day to day issues.

I suffer from Anxiety sometimes to the extent that I cant leave my home or even do simple tasks but I try to keep it all hidden. Only a handful of people in my life know I have anxiety and now that I’m in a relationship its something I really want to try to move away from and live a normal life. Like, everyone, we all have some sort of shit in our lives and I always keep my real feelings locked away that then becomes too much and I start to overthink and analyse everything. In most circumstances i try to give the whole I don’t care attitude and sometimes that works but then it all floods back into my head and it doesn’t matter what the topic is I always expect the worse. If you suffer from anxiety you can relate to some of what I’m saying and this is just a few things I’ve started to do that’s slowly helping me get a hold of it and take control of my own thoughts.

The first thing is talk about it! Men don’t share how they feel because they fear judgment or losing masculinity but the reality is your stronger for speaking up.
Ciarán (my boyfriend) for those who don’t know has really given me the push to be stronger without even realizing it. When we first started dating in the back of my mind I was terrified for a couple of reasons not only because of my coming out but fear he would think I was too much because I carry this baggage. I was so lucky that he didn’t judge me I start to open up more and share more of my life with him and I admire his view on worry and loss so its a goal of mine to be that strong some day.

My closest friend Leona is probably the only person and my mum who know everything about me and what way I think and how I process things. Leona has always had my back and I’m sure I drive her mad constantly doubting myself and doubting every situation in my life. Leona has a very logical way of looking at things and breaks down what I’m thinking and gives me ideas of how to fix it without actually telling me what I should and shouldn’t do. My mam is my rock and I’m not ashamed to say I’m a mammy’s boy but we help each other and we always talk to each other about how we feel and the support is always unbelievably strong.

So this is what I’m doing the past few months to try to get the anxiety out of my life and take full control over my emotions and fears.

Iv start to document everything! I know it sounds a lot but its really not. If I hit a stage in the day and trust me I hit several where i get overwhelmed with anxiety I just take out my phone and i put it into my notes I then try to move away from it and after I calm down I read it and its half the issue I felt when it first came to mind. I panic over loss so I fear because I let very few people into my life I fear that when I let them in they will hurt me in some way but this comes from past experiences where people close to me say or do things that make me lose trust. I’ve learned a lot over the past few months and I’m working hard on it for the next couple of months. I know this was brief and I only gave one tip but that’s the only tip I have right now because I’m still dealing and working on myself but if you suffer from anxiety or know somebody who does id love to hear your experiences and if you have overcome it then please share your tips and I will then post them on this page in hope to help others suffering in silence.


Gary x

Easy ways to improve your fitness and health

Before I start I just want to stress I am not a professional in fitness or health these are just things I do to improve.

People think you have to spend hundreds of euro and endless hours in the gym but you really don’t.

I do 3 days a week 1 hour each evening. When I was younger I had a very fast metabolism but unfortunately that’s not the case now that I’m older but I figured out ways that work for me to shed unwanted fat.

I break my body down into 3 stages and delicate each section to a different day.

Day 1: Chest, arms and abs

Day2: Shoulders, back and abs

Day 3: legs and abs

I do abs every gym session purely because it’s my focus point for insecurity so I try extra hard on this area.

If you’d be interested in my tips and tricks then subscribe to this page and I will be posting my full workout and routines.